I think I'm a lil lost.

lately I began to care about certain things that I shouldn't give a damn about.

Everything about this one friend of mine is so..familiar.

my brain has warned me to not give in to this familiarity.

but my heart did.

this friend brought back the one person that has passed me by,

whom I have loved.

I long to learn how to ever love again, I really do.

but how am I supposed to tune myself to the lies?

many times I wish it was real.

I wish I was different.

but I do know that I am not.

maybe I just missed being loved?

things that are happening now,

I can see that history is repeating itself.

Well, not exactly. I will  not allow myself to cry everyday for another three years.

NOT ANYMORE.

I keep reminding myself that now I can even let s2 fade,

what else will I not be able to let go?

A friend named Alan sorta reminded me that life is too short to stay in sadness.

a part of me knows that its true.

but the reason I get hurt a lil too easily is because I take people seriously and I don't like to be played.

and again, who does?

The moment I changed towards a person is when I know that this game isn't going anywhere.

so why start something just to end it?

I am no toy and I hope you guys are aware of that.

If you really have to play, I suggest that you do it with the others.

because to me, my life aint a joke.

maybe I will miss some of the time spent talking rubbish and laughing,

but it is better than to get into a deeper hurt.

I can no longer afford to be emotionally wounded once again.

I.AM.TIRED.

*what are words if you really don't mean them when you say them?*