Things change, don't they?
In my dictionary,the word "forever" does not exist...
today, you are the best of friends, but you can't be sure whether you will be tomorrow...
today, you are happy...does it mean that tomorrow,the sun will shine brightly?
today, you are healthy...will you be tomorrow,can you guarantee?
today,you're alive and breathing...will it be the same tomorrow?

Do not make promises that you cannot fulfill...
and do not add "forever" to it...
nothing lasts forever...
words are murderous enough without that seven-letter word...
whoever that puts the word in their sentences, I take it as a lie...
why?
because I know that these are empty,hope-crashing words...
because I'd rather be hurt not believing in it than to be hurt when that forever dies...
sometimes I got carried away by things that they say...
but I sorta have the "lie-detector" towards certain people
and their words no longer get my attention...
my friends?
I'm prone to their lies...
they might as well shut up...

I don't know why but I just feel like doing this...
Don't ask me whether I'm talking about you...
ask yourself what makes you think that I'm talking about you...
Sleep well people!

Rights...today I attended City Harvest Church again....I made David's dream(perasan!=P) coz he's been asking me to go for quite some time already...was gonna chicken out at the last minute but decided not to...Charmaine came early in the morning( kinda forced her to accompany me! XD)..the first thing I said when I got in David's car was " I didn't even go to my own church!)" =X

I suck... =/

felt really uncomfortable coz the last time I went to that church(or any church) was two years ago...got there...met some friends...say hello...listen listen...say goodbye...

Charmaine and I walked to Midlands from City Harvest! Thank God weather not that warm...

When we were in front of the Coco Boutique in Pulau Tikus near Phor Tay school we saw many popular cards along the way...theres like...more than 10 or smth?and took a video...we behaved like we've never seen a popular card...LOL...

got to Midlands and waited for Haslin in front of KFC...saw Joshua and his friend...his chicken got Charmaine's attention...she was famished...so was I...went over to say Hi and went back out...Haslin took buffalo minutes to come...walked to Gurney...and Charmaine can't get over Joshua and his chicken...went to Food & Tea...vained a little...

Charmaine and the Mango Tea?

lol

She's damn happy she got the whole piece of sandwich I ordered...

I got three bites...

Lol

Had a "meeting" and decided to go to Ferringhi to see a friend...

Crossed the road and saw a bus!

We all "food-shaked" while running to the bus 

Lol

Got on the bus...

*discussion*

Dunno which part of Ferringhi to get down...

**************

~Ferringhi~

ask bus uncle where to get down...

we don't quite know where were we heading..

*Friend calls Charmaine*

ok she saw us..

went to the beach..

vained a lil..

*discussion*

went to wait for the bus...

Same uncle!

saw him for the third time this week...

**********

Got down at Tanjung Bunga..

walked behind a group of Bangla who kept turning back to look at me.. 

=.=

They turned at the place a flasher "poisoned" my eyes...

Went up..

Home safe and sound...

Looking forward to go to City Harvest again.. 

=)

Loves

Yesterday,my sis Melody called me on Skype and we talked for more than an hour...she was very down...it hurts me seeing her this sad...she teared so badly...but I failed to show her any emotions...usually I will cry when I see her cry...but I was cold yesterday...she introduced a few sad songs to me...they didn't put a single tear in my eye...anymore...I went offline after that...while in bed,my eyes rained...and I figured it out...I cannot cry when sis was crying because I need to be strong when she was weak...only then she can lean on me...

I stared at the ceiling and remembered what she had said earlier...

Empty promises made and broken in a relationship of four and a half years...and I thought of S2...what's more when we've never even started?

People might think why do we believe in that person when we already know that its a lie?That is not stupid..its just that at times,we allow ourselves to be lied to in a certain situation by that particular person...We'd rather trust our beloved than to doubt them...we keep our eyes blinded and our ears blocked from the truth...

We might not have a beautiful beginning,but at least,give us a good ending...give us a complete answer and don't leave us hanging...tell us,if there really is a reason behind all this...we need to know and we will understand...we might say that we've moved on...but the truth is,we never did...the memories live in us...

If we say we're okay...that might not be the truth...if you think that we are happy,think again...not everyone is strong like you,nor as cruel as you are...if we say that what you've done didn't earn our slightest damn, we lied...

We are human beings with feelings and emotions...just like you...

okay I'm sorry I got carried away again...below are the lyrics to two nice songs that I know...I hope you like them... =)

Never Alone by Jim Brickman

May the angels protect you

Trouble neglect you

And heaven accept you when its time to go home

May you always have plenty

The glass never empty

Know in your belly

You're never alone

May your tears come from laughing

You find friends worth having

As every year passes

They mean more than gold

May you win and stay humble

Smile more than grumble

And know when you stumble

You're never alone

Chorus: Never alone 

Never alone

I'll be in every beat of your heart

When you face the unknown

Wherever you fly

This isn't goodbye

My love will follow you stay with you

Baby you're never alone

I have to be honest

As much as I wanted

I’m not gonna promise that cold winds won't blow

So when hard times have found you

And your fears surround you

Wrap my love around you

You're never alone

Chorus

My love will follow you stay with you

Baby you're never alone

So when hard times have found you

And your fears surround you

Wrap my love around you

You're never alone

(This is perasan-ly dedicated to S2 =P)

The next song is Someday When I Stop Loving You

by Carrie Underwood

Someday When I Stop Loving You

One foot on the bus about half past nine
I knew that you were leaving this time
I thought about laying down in its path
Thinking that you might get off for that
I remember that night we laid in bed
Naming all our kids that we hadn't had yet
One for your grandma and one for mine
Said we'd draw straws when it came time

[Chorus:]
I'll move on baby just like you
When the desert floods and the grass turns blue
When a sailing ship don't need a moon
It'll break my heart but I'll get through
Someday when I stop loving you

I bet all I had on a thing called love
I guess in the end it wasn't enough
And it's hard to watch you leave right now
I'm gonna have to learn to let you go somehow
Somehow

[Chorus]

Oh someday someday when I stop

[Chorus]

Someday when I stop loving you 

This is exactly how I feel! LOL

Sorry la my blog can be depressing sometimes.

Wish me luck for my visa!

Loves =)

The Fun Failed Mission!

I was supposed to watch LeeHom's "Love In Disguise" with Jolyn last Thursday...but she couldn't make it at the last minute so I was left with disappointment...Charmaine and I planned to watch it on Friday after school...and although the majority of us wanted to watch this movie we ended up watching Avatar because one of our friends wanted to watch it and we all gotta tolerate her to stop her from complaining...a BIGGER disappointment...not to forget the worst RM6 that I've ever spent in my life for that Avatar movie...so Charmaine and I planned to go to church on Saturday and to watch that movie in Prangin after church...on Saturday morning,Charmaine,Zed,Chia Ying and I met up at the Tanjung Bunga Market...the plan to go to church was cancelled due to some religious reasons and we were already late anyway...so we headed straight to Prangin...the first thing we did was to go get the tickets for Love In Disguise but this Cathay Cineplex does not have the movie! I was screaming my frustrations out in my heart! No word can describe my disappointment...theres nothing we could do so we bought tickets for The Expendables...seeing how disappointed I was, Charmaine suggested that we go to Gurney to catch that movie after this one...everyone agreed...

The Expendables  

is an all-star cast of action-movie icons headline Sylvester Stallone's explosive action thriller about a group of hard-nosed mercenaries who are double-crossed during a treacherous mission. Approached by the shadowy Church (Bruce Willis) to overthrow tyrannical South American dictator General Gaza (David Zayas) and restore order to the troubled island country of Vilena, stoic soldier of fortune Barney Ross (Stallone) rounds up an unstoppable team that includes former SAS soldier and blade specialist Lee Christmas (Jason Statham); martial arts expert Yin (Jet Li); trigger-happy Hale Caesar (Terry Crews); and cerebral demolitions expert Toll Road (Randy Couture). Traveling to Vilena on a reconnaissance mission with his old pal Christmas, Barney meets their local contact, a cagey guerrilla fighter named Sandra (Giselle Itie), and together the trio scopes out the landscape.. It isn't long before Barney and Christmas have discovered that their actual target is not General Gaza but James Monroe (Eric Roberts), a former CIA operative who has recently gone rogue. Monroe won't be easy to get to either, because his hulking bodyguard Paine (Steve Austin) is a force to be reckoned with. When their mission is compromised, Barney and Christmas are forced to flee, leaving Sandra behind to face almost certain death. But Barney isn't the kind of soldier to abandon a mission, or a hostage, and now in order to get the job done he'll need the help of his old crew. ~ Jason Buchanan, Rovi

Scenes from the movie...

One of the cast, which is also a very famous man,

Jet Li

became me and Charmaine's hero because he looked really cool in that movie!At least,we noticed him more than any other...

That is how we discovered the value of an old man.. =P

Seeing the time after the movie, I was quite certain that we couldn't make it in time to watch Love In Disguise in Gurney...but I was hopeful...

Knowing the movie time on weekdays, I hoped that they have more screening on weekends...but it was already 3smth when we got to Gurney...the time was the same as weekdays, 1,3,5 and so on...too late for the 3pm movie and couldn't get 5pm tickets because we have to get home early...maybe the movie and I are just not fated...?lol

Zed and Chia Ying left earlier so Char and I went to Food & Tea for dinner...

vained around a lil bit at the restaurant...

Charmaine between my fingers XD

My apple and Char's Strawberry milkshake

Smoked Ham Focaccia

Nissin Noodle with Sliced Beef

After that went to Midlands thinking that we wanna get the movie's DVD but they don't have it too! =(

Charmaine's mum offered me a ride and we waited at the back of our school gate since it is so near to both Midlands and Gurney...

Charmaine and I did this...we"mengharumkan nama sekolah" 

After that we went home and lived happily ever after...Our mission to watch Love In Disguise has failed.

Although I faced many disappointments, I guess I made the best out of them with the help and indirect support of my friends...

Last of all,take care people...

*S2*

Hello people...I hope everyone's okay...
To me,life is still that hard...I really feel like giving up too...
My medicine doses keep increasing... =(
Hospital is already like my second home...
many blood tests and those...
tiring you know?
Friends, forgive me if I was cold to you...sometimes I just wanna linger around the school,alone and thinking...
negative thoughts haunt me...a future that I will not be able to catch, they dance in front of my eyes...it shatters my heart whenever I see them passing by...these images are what I've always longed for...where's everyone is happy being together,enjoying each other's company...
I'm trying to keep away from everyone including people whom I love...so that it wouldn't hurt so bad if anything happens...maybe deep inside, I have already given up...I do not wanna believe in the positive,because when the good does not happen, I hurt very badly...
S2 said don't give up...
I wish I could be stronger...
There's a reason why I don't really write in the other blog anymore...

ARGH! I gotta stop being emo...sorryyy! so guys! have a great day aite! =)
anyways here's a link for my current favourite song...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pk4_7dDDGPk

depressing...lol bye!

Happy Birthday Delon! =D

It was like just yesterday when I blogged about Delon's and Celine's Birthday...Lol anyways, time changes almost everything and our Delon Kang Ti Lun look sizzling hot nowadays...not the "blur kia" anymore weihh! Hardly recognize him when I saw him in Gurney a couple of times. I wanted to put the before and after pictures of him but I guess not la.Later kena sue. =P And I don't mean any surgeries okay? Every part of him is still as original. LOL

I'm sure everyone knows him but for those who doesn't,this is our current Delon Kang. The "yeng" not the "blur".

See lah...macam professional model leh..hahaha..

I don't have much to say coz I'm obviously not updated about current issues.

So Delon, I wish you the best in everything that you do.

Missed those "bulbs-breaking" times. 

Don't stop having fun alrights? XD

At the beginning of the year I thought that this won't be that bad if I make lemonade out of lemons that God gave me...but now I seem to be taking every step leading to hell...those thinking that I'm happy whenever I smile or laugh,think again...you ain't close enough...I'm just like a book with a colorful cover but all that is in me are black and white pages....

I am living days~

of life:

where all that you do was never enough...

where you tell yourself that things are gonna get better but it never did...
where you find that you're alone when you cry...

where you sit and wonder  whether you'll ever recover from this pain...

1.       where no tear could describe your sorrow...

where dying seems to be the only way to end your miseries…

"if only its this easy..."

of love:

~where you wished that every girl who stood beside him was you...

~where  you wished that the broad smile on his face was when he's with you..

~where you think that someone who looked alike can replace him,but it'll never be the same...

~where you keep waiting when you know he's never gonna call...

~where you wish that every text you received were from him...

~where every sad love song brings him into your thoughts...

~where you keep praying for him to be happy and safe...

~where you do everything to make yourself feel better by thinking that he's happy without you...

~where thinking of him 24hours a day never seem to be enough...

~where you wished that he'll be there for you whenever you cry...

~where he seems to be the only person who can make your day or break your day...

~where you offer your heart to someone that you think its worth your pain...

the conclusion is....

                       you know who you are...

those not involved,have a good night! =D